Friday was a day of pure nonsense for me. For some peculiar reason I just couldn’t hold it together. I was at work completely frustrated, but I am assuming it was because I knew I had something to look forward to that evening. Whatever the case may be, everything that could have gone wrong during the work day did. I was ready to clock out and not look back. Bring on the cocktails, I was ready! Christina’s cousin flew into town from LA this weekend. We’ve been excited because it’s been some time since her cousin has visited. We knew that we wanted to have a night out on the town for some old fashioned girl fun. I’ve been really focusing on surrounding myself with love. It makes a difference in how you act, think and feel when you’re surrounded by those who love you with no limitations. I think every weekend for the past several months me and my girls have been finding a way to each other. We’ve made a way to make time for each other more than ever lately. Whether we’re chilling in the house laughing, while bbq’n, or swapping stories and tasting our own salty tears, our time spent has been therapeutic for us all. As I’ve gotten older and life has shifted. I find myself with less and less people that I can call a TRUE friend. What’s important to me is I do have true friends in my life. I’ve even been meeting new women and building new bonds lately. It’s a real blessing.
When we tax our friendships with neglect or mindless actions, we shut ourselves off from the support that makes life easier to bear.-Iyanla Vanzant
The world is a lonely place if you allow it to be. I remember going through a transition as a teen and distancing myself from childhood friends. It’s was a weird, long and very unpredictable period in my life. What I did realize most was how lonely I was. I had family and coworkers, but nothing compared to having a girlfriend(s) that you can cry to about life and everything in between. I always tell my friends over the years we haven’t been great friends to one another. In your mid-twenties you want to be more proactive in the people’s lives that are of value. I think it’s just more fulfilling to have women around who make you laugh, who genuinely support you and those that you can fight with and forget it all happened moments later. Embrace those memorable moments in life with friends. Focus on building great bonds, but more importantly concentrate on remaining committed to the friendships in your life. Nothing beats having someone around who knows you well enough to plan your first bridal shower in 5-10 years. I think my biggest regret ever has been the moments that I sheltered myself. I regret those moments when I remained closed off. I regret the times I didn’t send a random, “Hey girl, I love you text.” I regret the times when I thought it was unrealistic for a woman my age to meet new friends. I regret the moments that I pointed the finger at everyone else while refusing to look in the mirror. The ability to reflect on how you can be a better person to someone else really goes a long way.
What I do
not regret is nights like Friday night. I had an opportunity to get dolled up for a night out on the town with my girls. I couldn’t help but think, all that was bothering me earlier that day had completely been forgotten the moment I sent our reservation confirmation to the group chat. We sat at the table over dinner reliving moments in our teenage years. We laughed while discussing our most memorable vacations and the distant places we’ve traveled to together while pondering on where we are headed to next. Christina’s cousin Ashley vowed to visit more. The drinks flowed, the conversation was refreshing. It’s beautiful to have people in close proximity with whom you relate to. Keep them close and guard them with your heart. Over the years my circle has decreased in size but increased in value. The size of my circle is one thing in life that decreased and I am perfectly okay with. Do I doubt I’ll meet more friends in the near future? Not by far. I am meeting new faces every day. Good old fashion girl talk and fun will never go out of style. I feel as long as you’re putting in the effort, those valuable friendships don’t fade. They may have their ups and downs, but they don’t fade. If the effort is there the bonds will continue to flourish. One thing I learned from Carrie Bradshaw and friends is that, friends are soul mates too. It just takes a lot of bad seeds and filtering them out your life to find those you’re destined to grow with. Build those connections with those who help you flourish. Focus on the people that inspire you. If you have someone who goes out of their way to help you and offer you opportunities, offer the same in return. The quickest way to lose a friend is to not be one at all. So here’s to old friendships, new friendships, new vacations, new memories and love. Last night it was pleasure to be in the greatest of company, sporting a smile and all dressed up in love.