As I grew older I was always caught asking myself “who are you?” For years I grew up with a lack of understanding on who I truly was. I was aware of all things I loved, all of the things that made me happy, but I can always recall putting those things aside out of fear of not fitting in. Regardless of what we say, deep down inside it kills us to be disliked or mistreated. So what feels right is to become someone who we are not in order to be liked or accepted. It makes more sense to carry on pretending out of fear that we’ll be unaccepted by others simply for being our true selves. The downside to pretending is we are carrying on through life unsure of who we truly are. The things that we do and love aren’t a true reflection of us, they’re a reflection of the person that we’ve created.
Not being yourself does more harm that being yourself could ever do. After time you develop a habit of self-loathing and bitterness. It all starts innocently. The moment you’re reminded by someone else that you’re imperfect you seek to change your imperfections by creating a false cover-up. In order to begin the journey of self-awareness we have to be able to face our authentic selves. Yes, it may be difficult because you’ve spent so long running from that person, but the outcome is not only needed but worth it. Discovering ones true self and living in accordance to that is all up to you. Just know, choosing not to creates a repetitive pattern of being unfulfilled and an overall dissatisfaction with life.
I remember taking on a job because it fit what everyone around me wanted. I also remember being extremely unhappy. Feeling incomplete and forced into something that was leaving me feeling unfulfilled. Often times our commitment to things that feed our created identity grow deeper while we starve our true self. We dive into jobs, relationships, religious beliefs, friendship and more to feed an existence that is not of our own. Depriving yourself of an authentic life is self-sabotage. The only way to break that is to being the journey of self-awareness. You have to learn to love who you truly are deep within.
In life we all were created with the same purpose. What God requires of you is the same as everyone else, unconditional love. We first master the art of love for ourselves and when that is achieved we spread that love unto others. Those who fail to love themselves fail to accept and reciprocate true love. Living a life that isn’t authentic to who they were created to be. This is why so many of us struggle to find what feeds us in life. This is why it is so difficult to commit to anything or attract all of the right people because we aren’t living an authentic life. God cannot bless who you pretend to be. Not living in true form isn’t right. That in itself is a disservice to God and those around you.
I’m at peace because I know what true love for self is and anything else beyond that really doesn’t matter. I don’t have to fight to live a certain way, do certain things etc. I do what creates a fire inside of me. I indulge in everything that inspires me to love myself a little bit more every day. I have had my fair share of pretending and those days are gone. I love me enough to want to be me. Frankly, I believe that’s all God truly wants from us and to see us spreading that love onto others and glorifying him while doing so. We can’t live truly in that space until we discover who we are authentically. Don’t be afraid of who you REALLY are. Learn to be your authentic self.
Be Inspired. Be Encouraged. Be Blessed.