The Importance of Self Reflection

“I am the master of my identity. Anything evil or negative that I’ve chosen to project onto others is a reflection of my true self.” – AJ 


Every day I think I have finally found the courage to fully embrace my story and where I’ve come from. Growing up I faced a lot of adversities. Like many of us, life was deemed imperfect at a very young age. As an adult, I now see how difficult it is to grow beyond your adversities and your hurt. I see the struggle with accepting that you come from a place that defies the description of society’s norm. It became so very evident that my depiction of what I thought life would or should be wouldn’t quite turn out that way. At some point I developed the art of determining what life should look like by looking around at others. 

This is why I self-reflect. It is my chance to see where fault lies, creating an open opportunity to correct what is presently holding me back from being my best self.

My life wasn’t as close to the perfect image I perceived other people lives to be. Actually it was a complete and utter mess. In comparison to others I was far worse off than I truly was. Comparison was how I developed a habit of despising others for what I thought I lacked. Everyone around be became an enemy because I refused to see my own power and beauty. I thought it made me less then. My inability to self-reflect left me unsure about myself. 

If we aren’t careful we will point the finger and hold other people accountable for what we lack. It is not someone else’s responsibility to prove that we are worthy. Being content with self is an inside job.

Unknowingly my heart had grown to hate what I admired or was envious. Do you see how easy it is to create and enemy? Was it others that I hated or was it really myself that I hated because other people were a silent reminder that I wasn’t the person I desired to be?  Self-reflection helped me to discover the root of my pain. It helped me to release any and all negativity. 


“It’s easy to pretend ‘to be fierce and fearless because living your truth takes real courage. Real fearless and fierce women admit mistakes and they work to correct them. We stand up and we use our voices for things other than self-promotion. We don’t stand by and let racism and sexism and homophobia run rapid on our watch. Real fearless and fierce women complement other women and we recognize and embrace that their shine in no way diminishes our light and that it actually makes our light shine brighter.” – Gabrielle Union


At some point we have to learn that we are our own worst enemies. At some point we have to take a step back and realize it is not them it is us. At some point we have to take accountability for the fact that we create our own failures by living in fear of being inadequate, harboring on thoughts of insecurity driven feelings, feelings of inequality and feelings of self-doubt or worry caused by comparison. Our inability to constantly self-reflect leaves us misguided. Self-reflect. Dig deep. Figure out why you are the way you are. If something isn’t right work to fix it. Self-reflect because you care enough to see yourself be your best.


Ask yourself:

How Can I Seek to Live A Life According to God’s Promise for Me and Not Someone else?

 While many of us desire to live a certain life and create a certain lane, we fail due to our inability to see past what other people are doing. We self reflect to discover our own power. We self reflect to discover the beauty in being ourselves and nobody else.


“I have no time to worry if your grass is greener because I am too busy watering my own.” – Source Unknown  



Do a heart, mind, body and soul check:

What are you allowing yourself to feel? What are you allowing yourself to believe about you and others? How easy is it for you to discredit your faith in God? Are you more trusting in recreating a life that is not of your own or doing the work to flourish in your own light? What are you allowing yourself to believe about you that is allowing you to create false enemies in others and more importantly yourself?



How am I getting better? How am I healing? How am I growing?


“Thank you for not tap dancing on my misery, even when I wasn’t always returning the favor.” – Gabrielle Union 

We self reflect because we want to speak life into others. We want to uplift others with our actions and words. We self reflect because we do not want to live in a constant state of confusion about who we are. We self reflect because how we feel about us determines how we feel about the world and treat others. We self reflect because we know that the only thing in life that is constant is change. If we are not changing we have fallen in love with being stagnant. We have married the idea that there is something admirable or valuable about remaining the same. Start today by discover the beauty in being the most prized version of yourself. Self reflect, do the inner work!

Be Inspired. Be Encouraged. Be Blessed. 


4 thoughts on “The Importance of Self Reflection

  1. “My inability to self-reflect left me unsure about myself.”
    This is so true. In reflection, we often find our own self-worth so that we stop looking to others to fulfill us where we feel we are lacking. It takes real determination and presence of mind to stop your busy life and reflect. This post was a great reminder!

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