Freshly back from vacation and as with any other vacation I have ever taken I returned home with a new level of understanding of self. I have a better of understanding of life. All that I desire, what lacks importance and everything that is significant to me. I discovered that on my journey I’ve grown to redefine what my mission in life is. I’ve chosen to establish a better understanding of what I equate to success and what it [success] truly means to me. After so much time of feeling defeated, I finally realized that success was in the palm of my hands all this time. Success had been breathing down the nape of my neck and I could not recognize it’s breaths because I lived mute to what it all really meant. I had for so long been chasing a definition of success that was continuously leaving me fatigued and unconscious to what mattered most. I randomly wanted to strip myself of titles given to me over the years as a writer. I no longer desire to be defined as an “author” or a “blogger” I simply want to be only me. When I am me all else follows. It is all an extension of who I am, but does not makeup all of me. I’ve learned that my value is not dependent on social standards, affiliations, hashtags or materialized gain. I’ve learned that just because you can say that you’ve achieved these things it does not mean that you are greater that anyone around you. It does not mean that my life is any more significant than the next person. All it simply means is, I’ve sought out to do the things I’ve always dreamed about.
I had to stop relying on a title or accolades to make me feel any more significant than I truly was. A lot of the times we go in search to achieve certain things for the sake of being able to say that we are doing something with our lives. In this new age of social media if we are doing nothing, but living a regular day to day life we are nothing compared to others. If we don’t have something with our name on it we are useless compared to the rest of the world. Do you see the harm we do to ourselves when we live life according to society’s unrealistic expectations? We seek titles and accolades because we lack true confidence in who God created us to be. The doubt within ourselves forces us to feel inadequate or less important than those surrounding us. Then it slowly becomes to be all about the achievements and praise that follow those of achievements which in turn makes us feel good but only temporarily. I learned that my temporary highs were a result of me being reliant on all that is replaceable in life. We lose sight of why started. We dive into things we are not passionate about because we are in search of validation, relevancy, acceptance…
Traveling made me realize that everything I lack is on hold because I had lost myself in the process of trying to gain what was never important to begin with. I realized that I felt empty or unsuccessful because I had begun to make this journey about me. My life is centered on being a servant. My journey is about healing myself and being a living example for those who follow my work. It is centered on helping and changing the lives of others, it is not just about me. I’ve been overwhelmed with emotion since early last Wednesday. As my plane departed Los Angeles, CA in route to Miami, Florida I saw it to be the perfect time to talk to release the entire way there. I died on that trip and after realizing this my unexplainable outpour of emotion was now abundantly clear. I was in mourning of my old self. I was mourning the death of the person my soul had been stripping me of all these years. Life had come full circle and until this very day, I can see clearly the day I had begun my transformation and I will never forget the day I said goodbye to the old me. My life from here on out is dedicated to reminding myself that this is bigger than me. This is not about who is paying attention or how many people are paying attention. This is about who I am helping, how many people I am helping, and the lives I am changing and most importantly how I am growing myself. It is about being impactful on the lives of those who look to me to share my story. It is not about materialized gain, popularity and being known. It is about me being a servant. It is about me doing what I have been called to do and never forgetting why I’ve been trusted with such a grand task. It is me never forgetting that if I am working according to society’s standards and out for only myself, I have failed not only my people, but I had also failed my highest self. Cheers to living a greater life of purpose and understanding and empowering the world to do the same.
Thank you for trusting my stories to be a refuge for you in your time of need.
Be Inspired. Be Encouraged. Be Blessed.