Society teaches that we are each other’s competition. Society teaches us that in order to get ahead we must learn to devalue each other because apparently to put someone else down supports our own elevation. These types of things are predominantly forced upon the black community, more commonly amongst black women. Where diversity already is uncommon for us, we continue to create these invisible barriers which prevents us from elevating together because we’re too busy separating ourselves apart.
Diversity isn’t common and as we continue to break down walls and fight for racial equality across the nation, we still ignore the huge elephant in the room. That elephant being that for centuries we’ve been taught to hate ourselves, hate each other which further supports in the division of us as a people in order for us to remain powerless. I think if more of us understood that we are greater together, the chances of success and propelling forward would be far greater than they are presently. It all starts with being comfortable with yourself.
When you love yourself and you’re comfortable in your own skin you are far less likely to feel threatened by another woman, especially your sister. You’re focused on your own progression. You’re worried about how to elevate yourself mentally, spiritually and financially so you’re a leading example for your sisters. You are not trying to find ways to shame those who aren’t quite where you are.
Life is about advancement. As life advances your interest, goals and whole being should be transitioning along with life. What has been a true blessing for me is encountering women who are not only on the same journey but women who support my life transition. The women who see my flaws, my imperfectness, but still support and uplift me in spite of it all. I value the women who don’t tap dance on my misery. I appreciate the women who see when I am hurt and want to pull me out of that rather than enjoy seeing me fight to move forward in a painful state.
It is refreshing to know that there are women out there who would much rather support me than compete with me. There is power in supporting other women. There is so much power in women uplifting each other. I believe we will always have support of our family members and childhood friends. But, what happens when we step out into the real world? How often do we focus on building quality bonds and friendships with like-minded women that possess amazing, kindred spirits?
Honest support and encouragement from other women is something that we go without a lot these days. Being leading examples that friendships filled with love, support and appreciation amongst black women is important. We have to start setting examples for younger generations that the bottle throwing, hair pulling, backstabbing behavior that is displayed on VH1 isn’t a projection of how all of us feel about each other. We have to learn to support the separation of past hurt and trauma in order to build future friendships that are positive and influential in our lives. We have to stop thinking solely of ourselves.
When one of us succeeds we all succeed. In a way we are showing our sisters that #Blackgirlmagic isn’t limited to a select few of us, it’s available to all of us. Once we are aware of who we are internally we can tap into that divine femininity and take the world by storm. We have to be available to be advisors and offer support to sisters. If you have valuable information that can help someone else progress forward, why not share it? Show comradery, offer other women of color that level of support that they’ve forever been taught doesn’t exist. Think outside of more than just yourself.
Once we break the bondage of self-centeredness life opens up new doors. It enables us to see that life is more than just about us. We are nothing without each other. Learn to be happy for others because you genuinely want to see them succeed. And, because it takes NOTHING from you. My light won’t dim yours Queen and vice versa.
Life is about empowerment, especially if it includes other women. I’ve learned to fully embrace my friendships, new and old. I am happy to have created a platform for myself that enables me to let other women know they won’t be judged or turned away here. When we learn to focus more on uplifting one another we see the value of sisterhood and how it elevates us all. So here’s to establishing great bonds, being supportive, and loving. I Pray that I continue to connect with women all over the world who not only look like me, but continue to reach out to me when they need a few words of encouragement because they trust the strength of another woman, they’re sister, when they’re in need.
Be Inspired. Be Encouraged. Be Blessed.